Do You Blame Your Parents? How To Make Peace With Your Parents

Believe it or not, you as a soul chose your parents, and they chose you. There is a soul contract you have with your parents to either prepare you for your life or set up the challenges you may be dealing with later in life. Some parents do better than others, but no matter what, it is your responsibility to heal and transcend whatever challenges you might have because of your relationship with them. Remember that your parents were also in a state of evolution… making mistakes, and learning as they went along in time, just like you have been and everyone else is.

In this video, there are some suggestions on how to make peace with your parents, understand what happened, and how to handle it even now. First take responsibility as a soul for choosing them, then look at what dysfunctions you chose to deal with in this lifetime and handle them, and then make peace with what you chose by choosing your parents and heal any hurts that still remain.

Are Your Parents To Blame? Your Soul Chose Them, And They Chose You

You might be saying, “What was my soul thinking coming to this crazy world,” right? What in the world was my soul thinking? And why did I choose those parents who made a lot of mistakes and gave me all these dysfunctions that now I’ve got to heal and repair?

Well, first of all, your soul knew that it could handle what it was coming here to experience, and the dysfunction that it decided to sign up for. In fact, you don’t get to come to this world unless you sign up for a dysfunction. You were standing at the gate and the guides are there with the clipboard, and they say “Well, okay so you want go to Earth. Okay, what dysfunction are you going to sign up for?”

And you say “Hmm… I’ll take depression for 25, or I’ll take anger for 75. Or I’ll take grief, sadness, loneliness, loss, whatever it is, failure, despair. I’ll take frustration, disappointment…” whatever human dysfunction you decided to take in order to get into this world.

You don’t get to come to this world unless you contribute to healing the mass consciousness of this world. You must contribute to healing the human condition. That means you have to take on some sort  of human condition and rewire it from the inside out.

Easier said than done, huh? But you can do it. Don’t worry. You are equipped to handle it. You are a professional at this! Especially this particular condition. You’re a professional.  You would have not taken anything on, that you couldn’t handle. They don’t make you sign up for dysfunctions that you aren’t equipped to handle.

You knew that you could do this, and you found just the right parents who would set up the dysfunction for you. You were looking around saying “Okay, I’m going to take this particular dysfunction in the human condition. Let’s see, those parents,  mm-hmm… Aah, those two will do. Those parents would be perfect so for setting up the condition!”

You and your parents had a soul contract. You guys decided to do this together. They decided to be your parents, they agreed, and you decided that they were going to be your parents, you agreed.  This gave you your mission. This gave you the project that your soul agreed to, in order to come into this world. You cannot come into this world unless you take a dysfunction. And your parents were the perfect ones to set that up.

You guys are actually really good friends at the soul level to play these roles for each other.

Your parents are not to blame. You chose your parents willingly. You chose them to set up the dysfunction that you decided to take. You really did choose them. So don’t blame your parents anymore. You’re too old to blame your parents now. I don’t care how old you are, if you’re watching this video, you are too old to blame your parents anymore.

For all the mistakes that they made. You knew as a soul, coming into this reality, that they were going to make these mistakes. You knew. You took it on, on purpose, in order to take on the dysfunction in human condition that needed to be transformed, which you are capable of transforming.

So don’t blame your parents anymore. You are too evolved for this now. If you understand what I’m saying, you are too evolved now for blaming the parents. Say thank you. To your parents, for setting up the dysfunction that they did. Say thank you.

You might be driving your parents crazy if you’re a tough teenager or if you’re a tough adult kid, still. If you are hard on them, and you don’t listen to them at all.

Sometimes just say you’ll take note of what they’re suggesting. You’ll think about what they’re suggesting. That would help a lot if they at least  know you’re hearing them. Then you won’t have to fight with each other so much because you’re listening, even if you don’t take their advice. Even if you decide not to do it. However, try to listen, try to take their advice. They do know a thing or two about life. So give them a chance to teach you.

Maybe they’re not exactly like you and they’re not doing things the way you would want to do them. But give them a chance to give you an education about life. That’s all they want to do for you. Your parents really love you. They really, really, love you. They might have a weird way of showing it. Maybe they’re a little too controlling. But that’s only because they don’t want you to make a lot of mistakes. They’re trying to help you. They’re trying to help you avoid mistakes that they’ve made. Or mistakes that they’re pretty sure you’re going to make.

So give them a chance. All you have to do is just say, I’m listening, I hear you,  I’ll take into consideration what you’re saying. Then it’s up to you whether you use their advice or not. If they can feel heard you guys won’t be fighting so much.

Also, sometimes just give them what they want. This will also cut down on the conflict. Ask yourself if it is really worth the fight to not give them some of what they want. For instance… Be respectful to their religion. If they’re Buddhist be respectful to their religion. If they’re Atheist be respectful to their beliefs. It’s okay. Even if you are different, let it be how it is for them. Don’t try to change them or try to get them to do something different that they don’t want to do.

Maybe you aren’t doing it as good as you think you are doing it. Maybe you could use some improvement. And they know a thing or two about life. So give them a chance to help you.

All right, well don’t drive your parents crazy. Give them a chance. You guys are really good friends and you have a soul contract together. You guys decided to do this together. You all love each other very much at the soul level. So, try not to make the Earth life quite so bad. Doesn’t have to be terrible if you don’t make it so.

Right now imagine your parents in front of you, just close your eyes for a moment. Just imagine your parents in front of you. And embrace them with your angel wings. Embrace them with your love. Embrace them with your wisdom, your understanding, and your gratitude for them to have set up this situation for you, this work for you that you agreed as a soul to come and do.

You did, you agree to it. You are never put into something that you didn’t agree to here in this world. That’s not how it works. You only take on what you agree to, and you only take on what you can handle.

So forgive your parents right now. Forgive them. In fact I’m going to tell you a better, a higher way, to go about this, where forgiveness is not necessary. This is — no blame in the first place.

I have a video about forgiveness, but I’m going to give it to you in a nutshell right now. See everybody you know as one-self learning at different levels, places and perspectives. This one self, this God self, Learning about who it is, how to use power, how the cause and effect duality thing works. This is an idea that God’s self is exploring.

When you see everybody as a part of Godself, making the mistakes (or shall we call them educational moments because there’s no such thing as mistakes, it’s really just educational moments.) Your parents were ones who were having educational moments, while having children.

If you have not had children, whoa! That is a tough job. Talk about the fast track of growth. Children are tough teachers. And I have a feeling if you’re watching this video, you were probably not an easy kid to raise. Right? Come on, let’s be honest. I know I wasn’t! Most of the people on this kind of path, they weren’t easy kids to raise. So let’s give our parents a break ok. Let them be humans growing too, because as they were, with you. They were learning.

They were learning what to do and what not to do. Maybe some of these lessons will not be finished being learned in this life, but for most people, your parents are improving. They are trying to become better people just like you are. Even when they did things wrong in your childhood, they learned from it. Most of the time they didn’t do it again. They tried to stop doing that and tried to find other ways, more creative ways, of getting through to you about how to be in this world, or what they needed you to do, or not do.

So give your parents the benefit of the doubt. And don’t even blame them. Say “Thank you” for giving me the opportunities to take on a human dysfunction so that I can grow. And thank you for the support that you gave me, even though I was a bratty child. Thank you for feeding me anyway. Thank you for sheltering me. Thank you for working two jobs to raise me.

Your parents actually gave a lot. Very few people really understand and appreciate what their parents gave them until they become parents themselves. Realize the self-sacrifice of it all. Your parents had to sacrifice a lot in order to raise you. So be grateful even if they didn’t do it all perfectly right. Even if they didn’t do it like an enlightened parent should.

Then just let that part go and realize that they are beautiful God self beings too and they deserve your love, gratitude, and your appreciation. So shhh… Stop, stop, stop, stop blaming the parents. You’re too old for this now. You’re too evolved. Look at it from a higher perspective. Look at it from a masterful perspective. A place of eternal self. And give them your love, your compassion, your appreciation.

Maybe give them a phone call. Give them some flowers. Give them a card. Give them an amount of your time, whatever it is. Just out of the blue. For no reason. Don’t wait for birthdays. Don’t wait for Christmas. Don’t wait for a holiday of some sort. Don’t wait for this.

Give your parents your love. Right now. Right now.

Take the time out for them because you don’t know how long you have them. For some of you you’ve already lost your parents. They’ve already crossed over. Even if you think of them now and give them a spiritual hug, they’re still going to hear you. They’re still going to feel you. They’re going to hear your appreciation and this will make them feel good. If your parents are still here, though, make time for them. Make time for your mom. Make time for your dad.

Meet them where they are, instead of trying to get them to understand you. You might be a little wacky for them right? So don’t try to get them to understand you. If they do, great, lucky you. If they don’t, meet them where they are.

For instance, my mom she wanted me to be a missionary, and I am a missionary of sorts. Not quite the kind she thought I would be, but I am on a mission to make the world a better place. I am living in Ecuador helping people reach higher consciousness, and my mom was actually very happy with that!

That was the way I found to connect with her in a peaceful way. I read her Bible verses too and we started to get along great. It’s no skin off of my back to meet her where she is. Instead of trying to get her to meet me where I am. This is how to make a good connection with your parents even if you’re very, very different. I respect my mom’s path, I respect her views.

Let’s say your parents are in a different spiritual path than you. Or they have different political views than you. Or they have a different way of living, or eating for instance. Whatever it is. Instead of trying to get them to understand you, or trying to get them to believe in the spiritual path that you do, or trying to get them to eat the way you do, instead meet them where they are.

Say something nice about what they’re doing. “I respect your spiritual path…” Most spiritual paths are good anyway, so be supportive. Honor that.

Maybe the way they eat isn’t the way you would eat. Instead of being confrontive, say, “Hey that smells really good. I like what your making.” If you really want to stretch yourself, maybe even say something nice about the political person they love even if you totally disapprove of that candidate.

Whatever it takes to connect with your parents, do that, and meet them where the love is. Be the bigger person. The idea is to meet them where they are. Meet them on common ground that they can understand. Your parents may not be around for much longer, who knows. Even if they have plenty of life left in them, who knows if somebody can get sick or be in an accident, or something happens all of a sudden, and they are gone. What is the last thing you want to say to them? It should always be something good.

One day my father said to me when he was… hmmm… I think he was in his 60s, 50s or 60s, and he said, “You know, I might only have 20 years left in this world and at the rate we’re going, I might only see you 4 or 5 more times in my life.” At the time we were only seeing each other every four or five years, because he lived on the East Coast and I lived on the West Coast of the USA. “I may not have a lot of time left in this world. So maybe we’ll only have a chance to see each other a few more times if I live only another 20 years in this world.

I was like whoa! Wake up call.

From then on I made sure that I saw my dad every year. I didn’t let four or five years go by anymore. Whichever one of us had more money, we’d fly to the other one’s place, or maybe we’d fly the other one out. Somehow, someway we always made sure that we got a chance to see each other once a year so that we would never feel like we had lost the chance to connect.

So make time for your parents. Make time. Don’t think that they’re just going to be there forever. And don’t blame them anymore for the mistakes they made. They gave you who you are. It helped you become a compassionate person, it helped you have a life mission, your ticket in here, some kind of dysfunction in the human condition to repair and rewire.

Love your parents, love them very much. Even if you can’t hang out for a long period of time because they drive you a little crazy with their own dysfunctions they might have never healed. Love them as much as you can. They are teaching you unconditional love. Be with them, forgive them, don’t blame them in the first place. You’re too old for this now.

Get to work angel! Rewire this human condition. You can do this. You got this!